My Notes

• Read Erich Fromm’s The Art of Loving (1956). p 6
• Favorite Article: Day Care Centers, by Magda Gerber. p24
  • Wondering how much of this is still true?
• “What are the infant’s needs, beyond those for food, rest, warmth, and hygiene? Most people would respond, “love and cognitive stimulation.” They try to meet the need for love by rocking, fondling, and body contact. They try to meet the need for cognitive stimulation with objects, teaching materials, and lesson plans. They separate education from routine caregiving activities.” Magda Gerber. p 25
• Emmi Pikler advocated for non-interference in gross motor development. She suggested that “by allowing the child freedom of movement, parents would develop respect for their baby’s individual tempo and style in other areas of development as well.” p 52
• At Loczy there is “careful organization of space, time, and interpersonal relations.” p 53
• “Respect is the guiding principle in situations other than routine care. It can best be defined as selective intervention and is based upon sensitive observation. Knowing when not to interfere is often more important and generally more difficult than indiscriminate intervention.” p 56
• Gross Motor Development Section: “…a child restricted from moving freely is deprived of the long hours of exercising in transitional postures before mastering the next developmental skill.” p 59
• Hazards of overstimulation: “Until recently, infant programs were analogous to infant stimulation programs. The appeal of infant teaching and stimulation appears to be undergoing reconsideration, with concerns about the hazards of overstimulation now being expressed. We are not moving into a period where “the term ‘infant stimulation’ is misleading and should not be used in identifying educational programs appropriate for young infants and their parents” (Bromwitch). The basic philosophy of Loczy could be represented by bruner” “There is inherent in the description given of the growth of infant skill and emphasis on self-initiated, intentional behavior. Surely the chief practical recommendation one would have to make… is that the infant should be encouraged to venture, rewarded for venturing his own acts, and sustained against distraction or premature interferences in carrying them out. It is a point of view very alien from such ideas as presenting “deprivation’ or providing enrichment, both of which are highly passive conceptions”.” p 60
• Loczy guidelines are:
  • Basic trust in the child as a self-learner and initiator
  • An environment for the child that is physically safe, emotionally nurturing and consistent
  • Intimate human relation with one primary carer
  • Concept-free observation of the child
  • Minimal interruption of the child at play; large amounts of time allotted to play
  • Independence for the child in movement, choice, activities
  • Involvement of the child in all activities with the carer
  • Respect for all human beings, including infants
• “And the infant? What does he say? He adjusts or he revolts. When he adjusts and keeps quiet, it is taken as proof that what we did was good for him. And when he cries, the circle begins. We put him down or pick him up; we rock him or ignore him, feed him, play with him, put him in a bouncer, give him a new toy. One sometimes wonders — the infant must be miraculously resilient, or is he? If we look around the adult population, we wonder if perhaps we pay a high price for adapting to such a confused upbringing.” Magda Gerber. p 64
• “We are a preventive mental health program, not a day care center.” Magda Gerber. p 65
• “…selective intervention… that allows the child to reveal himself, to make his own choices, and to evolve his own style of mastery.” Magda Gerber. p 66
• “Infant and parent education as well as training and consultation occur simultaneously. They are interwoven, creating the matrix of the DOP. It is one thing to present a philosophy of child rearing, but no matter how impressive it may sound, it is quite another to apply it in everyday situations. This is why our program is based on demonstration. Though directly we only reach small numbers of infants and mothers and trainees, we are a visible model which shows how respect is our guideline every time an adult talks to, cares for, and even thinks of infants.” Magda Gerber. p 66
• Favorite Article: Notes on the Demonstration Infant Program
• “Many parents feel weary from the relentless ongoing life with a dependent child. Parents have needs too, which often get shortcut when faced with a nagging child. There is an easier way of life with a child, which is demonstrated in the process of the class.” Phyllis Sletten. p 70 
• “In our California programs, the emphasis is similarly on obwervation, anticipation, and selective intervention. Observing her child helps the mother or carer to learn about individual characteristics of her child adn to realize what she can reasonably expect of him at any given developmental level. This, in turn, helps the mother synchronize her behavior with the child’s needs, tempo and style. Anticipating each other’s reactions fosters mutual understanding, acceptance, and basic trust for both mother and child; thus, anticipation becomes the forerunner of communication. Selective intervention means knowing when not to intervene, and this is more difficult than intervening indiscriminately.” Maga Gerber. p 79
• “… our goals are influenced by our concept of an ideal human being as one who has some or many of the following characteristics: realistic trust in himself and his environment, perception of his inner needs and ability to communicate them, the ability to make choices for himself, which includes knowing and accepting the consequences of his choices, flexibility, and the capacity to learn from past experiences, the ability to deal actively with the present and play for the future, and free access to his creative talents and resources. Further, he is goal-oriented and also enjoys the process of problem solving, whether physical, emotional, or cognitive. Identification with these ideals implies that we have to critically examine child-rearing practices in order to determine which would facilitate and /or hinder the emergence of the desired characteristics in infancy.” Magda Gerber. p 79
• Favorite Article: Form Stress to Distress
• “Parents are the first and most important teachers of their children. But parents have gotten so busy and are trying so hard to “teach” their children that they do not realize just what the children are learning from them. Children who are taught to pick the “right” picture or give the “right” answer learn to please. They do not understand the questions, which have no meaning for them, so they cannot make a real choice’ all they learn is to respond to their parent’s cues. Parents may, even unintentionally, give clues such as facial expression, tone of voice, or subtle gestures. Infants learn to perform, like an elephant in the circus who is not appreciated for just being an elephant, but for doing tricks.” Magda Gerber. p 82-83
• “On the other hand, our children have never been taught to perform certain skills which are generally taught. Loczy has encountered a great deal of criticism and controversy on this point. Yet we insist on continuing not to teach the children these skills. What are the skills we refuse to teach our children? The infant is never put in a more advanced position, in order to promote gross motor development, than he is able to attain by himself from a basic supine position. His attention is never drawn to a toy by placing the toy in his hand, or having it dangle over his head, thus compelling him to notice it. Finally, we also make a point of not including social contact between the infants, in conformity with adult ideas. As a matter of principle, we refrain from teaching skills and activities which under suitable conditions will evolve through the child’s own initiative and independent activity. Naturally, we must provide the children suitable conditions — that is, freedom for activity and adequate space. Their environment must be stable, varied, and colorful.” Emmi Pikler. p 87
• Favorite Article: Forms of Hospitalism in Our Days, Emmi Pikler
• “A caretaker who does not usually look after a child will not know the child entrusted to her; a nurse who takes turns in varying groups does not really know any of the children. If she is competent and dedicated, she may get a look from one child, a smile from another, some cooperation from a third child, and peace and quiet in the whole group; but she will not even realize that no real contact has been established with the children. The interactions which may be formed are mostly scanty and stereotyped. She does not know their habits, nor do the children know hers; she is not aware what their crying or gestures mean and is accordingly unable to respond to the needs of the children. Hence, the signs emitted by the children become scarce and increasingly scant, while the caretaker’s work gets mechanical, often indifferent.” Judit Falk. p 120
• Favorite Article: Educaring, Interpersonal Neuroscience, and Selective Intervention, Ruth Anne Hammond
• If a parent had a less than sensitive caregiver as a child, they may struggle to understand and respond to their babies’ needs. p 151
• “I want to emphasize that all parents do the very best they know how to dom and never, ever, should be subject to negative judgements; this is never helpful. They need to receive the same compassion and space for growth that we advocate for infants. There is an attachment history inside every person. This includes facilitators, and some insight into one’s own attachment style is important before embarking on helping others.” Ruth Anne Hammond. p 151
• Parents who want to do better than what they received will look for info in books, etc. Gerber realized this is not always the best way to learn. Her method of meeting to learn to sensitively observe their babies was brilliant and is very effective. p 151
• “What is remarkable about this format is the level of protection given to the infants’ autonomy. By discouraging the parents from stimulating the children during class, Magda gave the parents the opportunity to see what their infants were interested in without outside suggestion or coercion, what they could do on their own without help, and how they related to the other infants and adults in the group. We call this quiet observation time” because the adults still themselves to make way for the infants or toddlers to find out what interests them without coercion of anky kind.” Ruth Anne Hammond. p 151
• Parents are often surprised by how capable their infants are and become advocates for children’s rights. p 152
• “If a child is cared for with consistency and sensitivity to her needs and capacities, she will develop securely, with an assumption that people can be trusted to help in times of need and to collaborate in creating happiness. If a child’s important caregivers are not consistently available to meet the child’s physical and emotional needs, insecure patterns will form. The child will become a person with less trust in others and himself, and be less able to handle stress and live happily. Ruth Anne Hammond. p 152
• Baby learns about his emotions by seeing them reflected on his mother’s face, if she is sufficiently sensitive and attuned. If he doesn’t have this experience in early life, he may never be as understanding or able to read other’s emotions. p 154
• Even adults need others to interactively co-regulate, though different than ways of young children. p 155
• Quality of early care is extremely important. Advocated delaying the return to work as long as possible. p 156
• Selective intervention. Adults can pay attention to the child and refrain from intervening when the child shows a tolerable level of distress as this can help the child to learn to manage challenges on her own. p 156
• Poorly coordinated interventions interfere with a baby’s ability to self-regulate. p 156
• Baby learns to make sense of experiences through the mother’s response. If the mother is overly concerned, the baby can learn that. If the mother is calm, the baby learns that. A mother who is sensitively observing, not doing anything, is still felt by the baby as true support. p 157
• As caregivers, we should give our attention to the meaning that children seem to be making. Our mere attention to their process determines what qualities are encoded in their brains. p 157 
• The main task of parents and caregivers is to be connected enough to be able to see if our baby needs help or not. p 159
• It is more important to support emotional connections than cognitive learning. p 159
• “… it is more important to read the baby than to read to the baby.” p 159
• “… if self-regulation is composed of a combination of co-regulation and auto-regulation, the sensitive adult is actually co-regulating when allowing an infant a chance to auto-regulate. Allowing a child (when he is not stressed to the far reaches of his regulatory boundaries) appropriate opportunities to auto-regulate is not abandonment; it is discernment. It is, as Magda coined it, selective intervention.” Ruth Anne Hammond. p 159
• Favorite Article: When We Touch the Infant’s Body, bu Judit Falk. p 162
• “High-quality care enables the child, by his innate ability, to get to know about “live in” his body, to find pleasure in its functioning and to learn from it, and to realize that his skin forms a natural boundary between himself and the rest of the world.” Judit Falk. p 162
• An infant learns to make sense of his experiences of his body sensations and needs through interaction with the caregiver. At first they are just unpleasant. The caregiver helps him to learn to understand them. p 163
• “If the child can trust to be able to influence the events happening to him, if he can feel that he is not a possessive receiver, but an active participant of his care, then his sense of competence will grow stronger. If he is never dealt with as if he was an object — be it either precious or worthless — but as a human being who feels, watches, remembers, and understands or will understand… ., if the words and gestures are not only nice but they also consider the sensitivity of the child continuously, then a real dialogue will form between the two partners during nursing, starting at the youngest age.” Judit Falk. p 164
• “The authentic behavior of the adult is part of the good care. What this means is that every detail of the child’s well-being, every reaction, mimic, tone, and intonation of his body, is important to her, and she is aware that what she is doing with him has an effect on not only him in the present but also his future.” Judit Falk. p 165
• “The genuinely participating infant takes part in the care with the pleasure of “I am doing it myself.” From time to time he also allows himself to concentrate on something else, to move around, or to turn the adult’s attention to something else, and the cooperating adult accepts these detours as much as possible.” Judit Falk. p 166
• The image that the young infant creates of his own body, based on the experiences of the first few months or years of his life, will deeply influence his future. His care during infancy will affect his entire life, [his] personality, his self-image, the development of his self-consciousness and his sexual well-being, and his adult behavior as a parent. His relationship to his own body and its functioning depends on the quality of the care, its being pleasant or unpleasant, and the good or bad feeling of the adult nursing him.” Judit Falk. p 167
• Favorite Article: Facilitating the Play of Children at Loczy. Anna Tardos. p 168
• Many definitions of play, here using the term to mean a chance for uninhibited free activity, in most cases using an object to play with.
• “In no way do we see our task to teach children how to play or stimulate them to play. We are learning from the children how to play, rather than the children learning from us.” Anna Tardos. p 168
• “Our basic premise in facilitating children’s play is that our help must always be indirect. We offer possibilities; the child makes the choice. For example, it is our task to provide toys, but we never put any toy into the infant’s hand.” Anna Tardos. p 168
• Favorite Article: The Pikler-Loczy Philosophy — Loczy Research and Current Popular Views. p 172
• Pikler encourages cooperation from an early age. When baby gets old enough to assert will, adults start to cooperate with baby and appreciate his developing will. 🙂 p 196
• “Go slow. And then go slower.” Magda Gerber. p 204
• “… a large part of burnout has to do with continuing to work in systems that are broken, acting in ways that are not in accordance with our inner voices, and drudging through processes that have problems and waste time.” Deborah Greenwald. p 218
• “We need to remember to trust ourselves, and to listen to our inner barometers. Do you need to make a change, speak to someone, listen to someone? Vault?” Deborah Greenwald. p 219
• Magda relished intense discussions, “Go ahead, disagree with me–I love it!” p 220
• “Are your expectations reasonable? Is your environment supporting you? What can you change to make life easier for you and the babies?” p 220
• “A still and silent child is not obedient, he is annihilated.” Maria Montessori.
• Bedtime ritual. Maybe 3 steps instead of 10. Do something that is sustainable everyday. Do we feel pumped up or drained? We can tell the difference. p 220
• Making a mistake is okay, what matters is repair. p 223